Wednesday, December 2, 2009

my conversation with God (uncut)

 In the comfort of my bedroom,the clock has just gone 3:26 a.m and i still can't sleep, so i get on my knees instead.

God: Well fancy meeting you here, i'm surprised you remember where to find me!
shukie: I still know you exsit if that's what you're trying to imply, the past year has been hectic.

God: I'm sure it has.
shukie: Don't patronize me, you're the one who allowed everything i've been through to happen. All the disappointments, all those decisions i spent sleepless nights trying to make, that failed anyway. Can't you cut me some slack?

God: (laughs) Is that the same reason we're here now? Your insomnia? Well if you'd trust that i have everything under control with regards to your life then you'd sleep at night wouldn't you? I allow bad things to happen to you because the devil wants to mess with you. Though i'm always certain if you seek me while he's doing his thing then you'll realise how much power i trully have.
shukie: So this is an ego thing, again? Mankind are like pieces on y'als chess board right?

God: Why are you so mad?
shukie: Because you let me down... again! Looking around me i see everyone successfully living their lives, but me. They have the perfect homes, perfect cars, perfect relationships! It really makes my blood boil.

God: Well if you'd talk to everyone you'd realise that they all have one thing or another they aren't happy about. If you'd stop shutting yourself out of  people's lives and switching your phone off for weeks on end, then maybe you'd actually be there when someone needs you! You are quite selfish shukie.
shukie: Who needs me anyway? And i can switch my phone off as i please, thank you very much. That's really up to me. And don't even start about all this social networking crap.

God: So don't come complaining to me about you loosing friends, you self fulfill.
shukie: And i thought you where supposed to make me feel better?

God: ( sighing)You make it extremely difficult. What's this really about then?
shukie: It's about MY life, it's about the people you keep making me meet, it's about stuff with mom, it's about my sisters. There's nothing right about any of it. Some days i just want to end it all

God: well why don't you?
shukie: The thought of burning eternally in hell and you being more mad at me. Listen just tell me about 2009? What was that seriously about?

God: Growth. Despite what you think, you met great people, made friends who will be in your life for ages and you grew stronger.
shukie: I'm tired of being strong

God: I love you, all i want is the best for you. I'm not the enermy.
shukie: I'm sure that's what the devil says too.

God: Each time i've wanted you to acknowledge me and seek me, you've basked in your own self glory. Prancing around like you are responsible for all the GOOD things that have happened this year.
shukie: (smiling) and there have been some good things that have happened this year, i'm sorry i forget you at times.

God: I've heard that one before.
shukie: Please don't give up on me just yet. I NEED YOU. Need you to make sence of this world, when i'm broken, when i'm sad, when i'm MAAD as hell... opps my bad. You get the point though.

God: I did say i'll never leave you or forsake you.
shukie: Okay now that we're talking again. Can i just say what i want for Christmas. All i want for Chrismas

God: The homeless to be fed, orphans to find love and world peace.
shukie: An iphone.

We both burst out laughing, i get off my knees and get some sleep. Tomorrows a another day, right?